pass-the-pencil:

My anaconda don’t
My anaconda don’t
My anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hun.

3,980 notes + 1 hour ago
Charlotte, NC 9/28
2,015 notes + 1 hour ago

bluelikelou:

This is my favorite picture that I took that night

Phoenix, 09.16.14

136 notes + 4 hours ago
#FnF
16,671 notes + 12 hours ago

Actual Sweetest Human Person

anylessanymore:

Harry really, genuinely is such a sweetheart. There were two little girls 3 rows ahead of me, right on the side next to the catwalk, the older one was no more than 8 or 9 and I’d guess about 7 for the younger one. Harry stopped multiple times to blow them kisses and smile at them. He is constantly blowing kisses and waving at the fans (he and Liam definitely do the most fan interaction), but he made it a point to make it obvious every time it was for those girls. Liam stopped once to blow them a kiss and Niall stopped to make silly faces at them, but Harry kept going back. (They were pretty cute and SO excited every time.) (I didn’t notice any special interaction with them from Louis or Zayn but I could have missed it as there’s so much going on all the time.) This was sweet enough on its own, but towards the end of the show, Harry had a towel with him. He stopped right in front of the girls, kissed the towel, and tossed it to them. They were completely freaking out (and so were those of us behind them who saw). Then, a minute later, he came back with ANOTHER towel, stopped in front of the girls again, kissed this second towel, and tossed IT to them. So they wouldn’t have to share. So they’d each have their own special towel from Harry Styles. Their mom was about to cry. I was about to cry.

I know it only took a minute for him to come back with that second towel, but the thought and care for those girls in that small act speaks volumes for the kind of person he truly is. I am so proud to be his fan.

809 notes + 14 hours ago

too-old-for-this-ship:

Harry doing the Single Ladies dance, August 21

6,224 notes + 15 hours ago

x

6,817 notes + 1 day ago
110,151 notes + 1 day ago

louteasdale: It says picture unavailable right

810 notes + 1 day ago

hermionejg:

fishingboatproceeds:

ohcurtains:

ofgeography:

so here’s a fun story about this movie. guess who loves this movie? me! i do! i love this movie. i love this movie so much that when i was in the 7th grade and i saw “first wives club 2” on pay per view i was like: HELL YEAH!! FIRST WIVES CLUB TWO!! NO ONE TOLD ME THERE WAS A SEQUEL!!!

here’s the synopsis for first wives club 2:

disgruntled first wives take their ex-husbands’ new lovers under their wing.

sounds great, right? awesome viewing material for a precocious 11-year-old.

so i buy this movie, and like, three minutes into it i’m starting to feel suspicious?? like it’s really low quality and my girls are nowhere in sight?? how come none of the first wives are the same?? how come they’re alone in a bedroom with mood lighting?? why is she taking off her shirt?? why are they both taking off their shirts?? WHY ARE THEY—

here’s what i did not know about first wives club 2:

  • it is a lesbian porno of no relation to the beloved 1996 classic.

so of course i, horrified that i’ve accidentally bought porn on my family’s account (and in that state of panic that kids work themselves into whenever anything regarding sex is mentioned), quickly shut off the TV and go upstairs and watch an episode of veggie tales to like, cleanse my soul and apologize to jesus, and that’s that.

EXCEPT, OF COURSE:

  • you have to pay for pay per view.

so the end of the month comes and i have completely put this incident out of my mind, haha, i accidentally bought porn, how funny, TELL NO ONE. right? and i’m sitting at a nice dinner with my mother, my stepfather, and my very religious aunt deb, and we’re just talking about farm things, whatever, when suddenly my mother puts her fork down and says, “okay, there’s something we need to discuss. as a family.”

  • AS A FAMILY.

and i’m like, running through a list of people i know who could conceivably be dead, and fantasizing about my mother announcing that she’s going to buy me My Own Computer Just Because U Earned It Kiddo, and she pulls out a piece of paper that says DIRECTV across the top. and i’m like: OH NO.

"i received the tv bill today," my mother said, and i was like, shoveling potatoes into my mouth as fast as i could because i knew that when i went to PORN PRISON they weren’t going to feed me this kind of quality starch. "does anybody want to tell me who purchased the pornography?"

as a reminder, a quick table survey:

  • my mother, surprised and disappointed by the porn bill (innocent)
  • my stepfather, a grumbly old cowboy who just wants to sing along to kenny chesney and watch the hunt for red october (innocent)
  • my aunt deb, a super religious catholic whose best friend is a nun named Sister Placid (innocent)
  • me, the 11-year-old with a mouthful of potatoes who definitely purchased the lesbian pornography

silence.

my mother said, “i’m not going to ask again.”

silence.

my aunt looked at my stepdad. my stepdad looked at my aunt. NOBODY LOOKED AT ME, THE 11-YEAR-OLD WITH A MOUTHFUL OF POTATOES WHO DEFINITELY PURCHASED THE LESBIAN PORNOGRAPHY.

my mother shook her head and put the bill down. “this was incredibly inappropriate,” she said. “skip, deb, whoever. buy that shit on your own time. i’m not paying for it. what if molly had seen it?”

  • WHAT IF MOLLY HAD SEEN IT?

"don’t expose my kid to that crap."

  • DON’T
  • EXPOSE
  • MY KID
  • TO THAT CRAP

"if you want to watch porn, fine, but do it in private and don’t expect me to pay for it. i can’t believe one of you did that in the living room."

  • I CAN’T BELIEVE ONE OF YOU DID THAT
  • IN THE LIVING ROOM

but molly, why didn’t you own up to it and explain that it was an accident?

  • are you fucking kidding
  • i did not want to go to porn prison

the fun conclusion to this story is that i never owned up to it, which means that there are 3 people in the world who have not solved the mystery of the lesbian porn. a quick survey:

  • my mother, who lives every day wondering whose porn she paid for
  • my stepfather, who probably wishes he knew less about his wife’s sister’s porn preferences
  • my aunt, who probably wishes she knew less about her sister’s husband’s porn preferences

but molly, why don’t you own up to it now, with the safety of time and distance and the knowledge that porn prison isn’t real?

  • are you fucking kidding
  • this is the best thing i’ve ever done

what an amazing story

Wow.

Someone get this lady a book deal because I want to read Tolstoy length books by her.

211,514 notes + 1 day ago
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